PLANNING | Stop Stressing! Let Love Rule Your Wedding Day


Your wedding day – possibly one of the most important days of your life. You are finally getting married to the man of your dreams, and this new chapter in your life begins. And if we were to ask you about your wedding – what is it that is at the root of the big day – we expect you to say one word. Love! After all, without love, what is the point of getting married in the first place? Right? Exactly, we can already see you nodding your head in agreement – don’t worry, we are imagining it, we haven’t hacked your webcam. However, on the big day itself, love seems to take a backseat to everything else. Why?

The wedding day can be stressful. You have spent months (if not a lifetime) planning the big day, sweating over the details that will make the day a success. You have agonised over the budget.

You have thought about whether to get custom silicone rings over diamond- encrusted pieces. Then there are the seating plans, guest lists, venue considerations, and floral arrangements to consider. Not forgetting the choice of food for the reception, the entertainment for the after party, and the honeymoon to think about. Details, details, details. It’s your big day and you want everything to be perfect, but you get so caught up in the minutiae that your groom, and the love you have for him, seems to be the last thing on your mind. Maybe.

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Stress leads to fraught emotions. You shout at your mum for inviting yet another distant relative you have never seen in your life. You get annoyed at the bridesmaids for not catering to your every whim. You throw water in the face of your mother-in-law because she has made another critical comment about your wedding choices. And then you yell at the groom because he has turned up in his trainers instead of the finely polished shoes you left with the best man yesterday.

You get anxious when the guests don’t appear to be having a good time. You worry that your hair won’t look quite right on the wedding photos. The world seems to end when you realize there is no wifi connection in the church – just how will you be able to snapchat those people who weren’t invited to the wedding? Calamity threatens to strike at every corner, and your ideas of a perfect wedding day disappear when your plans don’t come to fruition. Not all of them, anyway. And just who is that woman talking to your beloved? Okay, it’s his cousin, but in your pent-up state, your anxiety takes over and you don’t think straight. Everything is in turmoil.

So many worries. So many emotions. So many things that are just not what you wanted. And so you forget about what is important. You forget about the reason for the big day in the first place. Your need for a perfect day takes precedence over the one thing that matters. Love!

While we have generalised the stress people have on the wedding day – these things may not relate to you at all- we still want to leave you with this one message. Let love rule your wedding day. It doesn’t matter if things don’t go to plan. It doesn’t matter if things aren’t as perfect as you hoped. Remember what matters. Love. Love for your family who are only trying to help. Love for your friends who are only human after all. And love for your partner, the person you are marrying, and the reason for this day happening in the first place. Don’t sweat the small stuff. Don’t panic when things go wrong. Let love rule your wedding day, and you will not only make your day, but the day of everybody who supports and loves you.


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Shafonne Myers is a certified wedding and event planner who longed for bridal inspiration that looked like her. She has created a website and magazine that brings bridal inspiration to plus size brides. She does speaking engagements educating the world about plus size brides and self confidence.
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