Photo by 550Park Luxury Wedding Films on Unsplash
Are you writing your wedding vows right now? If so, then this post is for you. In this guide, I’ll introduce you to some of my humble suggestions for what you should write and perhaps what you shouldn’t.
Write how you speak
It sounds strange to say it, but it’s a good idea to write how you speak. Remember, your wedding vows are something you’re going to say out loud with your voice, usually in front of a lot of people and your spouse. Writing how you speak sounds easy, but it’s actually more complicated than you might think. Many people are trained in school to write in a specific way, so when you try to do it a different way, it comes out sounding awkward.
If you need help writing wedding vows, it’s actually easier than you might think. There are all sorts of services out there that will take your raw ideas and turn them into something magical you can use on the big day.
Aim for the sweet spot timeline
When you’re up at the altar with your beloved, 30 seconds can feel like a lifetime. For this reason, it’s a good idea to keep your vows relatively short. If you speak for five minutes at a business conference, it doesn’t seem like a long time, but when you’re up at the altar in front of the priest and everybody else in attendance, it can stall the pacing of the ceremony.
Most vows should last somewhere between 45 and 75 seconds when read out loud at a normal pace. This means that you want to write about 150 to 200 words.
Reduce gimmicks
Photo by 550Park Luxury Wedding Films on Unsplash
It might be tempting to add some gimmicks, like writing the entire vow in a specific rhyming scheme based on a favourite TV show. This sort of approach can mean that the fundamental message of the vow gets lost. Vows are, after all, a serious consideration, and they are a promise that you make to your future spouse. Therefore, you’ll want to make sure that the message isn’t obscured by humor or any other elements that you might want to include.
Go small and big
When it comes to vows, there’s a temptation to go big and be very grandiose. After all, marriage is supposed to be something that lasts a lifetime. It can be helpful to combine the big things with the little things. After all, it’s the little habits that ultimately ensure that a marriage will be successful.
For example, the large-scale picture might be something like you promise to stay with your spouse through their triumphs and their inevitable downfalls. You can also promise to never hide the good snacks from them and to give them a massage on a Sunday morning.
Start with “why you”
Lastly, it’s a nice idea to start your vows by saying you’ve chosen the specific person in front of you. For example, focus on the traits that make them who they are. Don’t focus on your shared experiences together or how they make you feel. Concentrate on their underlying character.
